So You Want to Build Community? Here’s How to Not Fuck it Up

I’ve been thinking lately about community engagement through the lens of my own participation in community, particularly what makes or breaks the communal spirit. These are deeply personal stories, based on my own passions, so take it all with a grain of salt, but each is a lesson in the art of engagement, highlighting the dos and don'ts of weaving the social fabric — I’m sure you have your own stories. I’m sure you’ll be able to relate. We all can.

First, a failure story, because those are always so fun (dopamine hit … yay!). Back in the day, I followed my passion for running by taking up with the Hash House Harriers. My attempt to join this "drinking club with a running problem" hit a snag right at the outset. Despite my going on the shared runs and participating in the after-parties, for whatever reason, there was a lack of personal recognition — stupid “little” things like my not being given a nickname after doing something notable, part of the HHH induction process tradition everybody anticipates and enjoys — that left me feeling invisible. Not to shit on HHH, they’re great with global chapters of all stripes, but in my personal experience I was overlooked and ignored, which made me feel like shit, so I bounced out (which sucks because I’d probably still be running with them today, and be all the healthier for it!). Community engagement is not just about bringing people together; it's about making them feel seen, valued, and an integral part of the narrative. Engagement hinges on personal recognition and the affirmation of each member's unique contribution. Here’s an example.

Shady Pines Radio is a small (growing) community of Portland-based musicians, music aficionados and DJs. It’s an example of community engagement done right. Born from a passion for live music and open mic nights, SPR formed a streaming radio station during the pandemic to sustain the community and the platform is now a thriving digital (and real-world) gathering place. My involvement felt like a dialogue from the start, with every shout-out and interaction with the other DJs and audience fueling my desire to contribute more. I was invited to a 1:1 conversation with the founders to get oriented and engaged — I felt seen. And without the (somewhat frictionless) opportunity for active participation, and receiving positive feedback, I guarantee you I wouldn’t have anywhere near the same sense of belonging and ownership as I do today — I feel actively compelled to contribute my skills to the cause. Engaging communities thrive on mutual appreciation and the shared joy of collective creation.

And now let’s look at the other passion-based community I’m part of (this is all by personal choice when I have extremely limited bandwidth by the way, which is important to keep in mind), this one around my passion for art and artists. Roboto Octopodo is a group of Portland-based artists who came together to create immersive art experiences to help revitalize deserted downtowns. My invitation to join this artistic endeavor (also a 1:1 personal call, where I felt 100% valued and seen) felt like a call to action, a chance to be part of something larger than myself. That was a great start, but the deepest engagement happened in person, both the first meeting with a team of artist all-stars and feeling honored to be amongst them, and the hands-on creative work, collaborating with other artists to build the experience together. Meaningful engagement requires more than just showing up; it demands active, collaborative contribution towards a shared goal. If you give people those opportunities to engage meaningfully around their passions, they’ll be clamoring to participate.

OK, last one. Burning Man, with its ethos of radical inclusion and self-expression, offered a canvas vast enough for every participant to paint their own story. My journey from a spectator (yep, guilty!) to active contributor was encouraged by the platform it provided for personal and collective expression, and — I think more importantly — the community's open arms and opportunities to plug in with people. My bit was fully flipped by what I experienced on playa, and that passion likely would have dissipated after I returned home if it weren’t for the ePlaya, Burning Man’s old-school BBS system, where I found a bevy of like-minded folks who liked me and my freakness as much as I loved theirs. We became fast and deep friends, punctuating the ongoing (one could say incessant) online conversation with IRL meet-ups across the country, forming an accessible micro-community within the larger BM community, which enabled the connection to go deep. Effective engagement happens when you give individuals the opportunity to find and connect with others in the community — so it’s not otherwise an intimidating ship under sail you don’t know how to board — in ways that resonate with them personally, fostering a sense of ownership and deep commitment.

You probably see some patterns emerging. And I’m reminded that as much as it is an art and a science, community design is actually intuitive. You know in your bones when it’s working and you know when it’s not. You feel it. It’s not unlike when you were a little kid in school, trying to find your way. Trying to find your place, and your people. You knew at a gut level what felt right and what didn’t. Who welcomed you and who didn’t. Who felt authentic and real, and when things felt superficial or transactional. Community engagement is no different — that little kid that remembers those feelings still lives and breathes inside every one of us. Deep down, we all want to belong.

Personal acknowledgment, positive reinforcement, collaborative contribution, and platforms for individual expression. This stuff doesn’t just attract people to a community; it’s the glue that holds them together, transforming loose relationships into lasting bonds. Doesn’t matter if you’re going for a run, creating art, DJing on an underground internet radio station — or [insert your passion here], the key to vibrant, engaged communities is recognizing and nurturing the individual flames within the communal fire. 

Chances are you have your own stories along these lines. Drop one in the comments if you’re so inclined.

This was written by a human.™ Thanks for reading.